snowslazzin

i haven't logged in for almost a year, and i had totally forgotten about this place.....as for enw work hmmm not so sure about posting any up.

although i know for sure my drawing skills are stronger than before!!!

but i'm currently way too busy at uni and work to deal with the net. I'm working on my website, soon to come.

wow i haven't updated my Da for ages!!!! i just haven't been bothered... *sigh
well anyways my summer has been a blast so far,

i've got a month left and need to enjoy what's left of it.
i went away in july to Cyprus the greek cypriot side of course!! Limassol, but yeah i know some of you are thinking ergh Limassol! go to Paphos!! I avoided Aiya Napa b'cos it's way too commerical....maybe one day i might go just to see what it's really like & the fuss is about.

so yeah i had my heart broken and fell for a guy. he was definitely "situation number 4 the one who left me wanting more..." and it hurts soo badly :'-( i went to cyprus to clear my mind and define myself, instead i came back with a million bunch of problems. I'm starting to think who the I think who the hell am i really? my friends who i met u with are ignoring me (which i don't like right now, but they are my friends - but i guess ppl change right? who cares if they're not my real friends, i can make new one's (BTW which i hate cos' it seems like i can't be stable) that hopefully will be nice).

but the thing is i came back actually changed as a person a bit, learnt from my mistakes and think i can figure out the women i want to be. it's these 19 years of confusion that can really fuck with your head and make life complex if you dive in too deep into your thoughts and unanswered questions. This life is sure as hell one big conundrum sometimes. i need someone who can keep my feet on the ground and make me function okay. cos' sometimes i just feel really chemically unbalanced and well yeah ok

Anyhow, i can't wait to get back to uni cos' i can have a fresh start in my first year finally in Animation!! (I graduated my diploma design with a MERIT!!)) wooo!!!

I hope the year ahead is going to be good....getting a new job would be nice since i am soo broke and gone into my overdraft. i hated my last job and so i resigned, my parents are like bullying me over it cos' i should have kept it over the summer and resigned when i start back uni...*sigh don't u just hate life at times?

well I feel better now after christmas, i guess it was just the winter depression that got to me.

anyways been hanging out with new friends and feel much better. I've been so much happier and also i also met a guy that i like.

So today I have some free time to actually do some work. I have to review 3 films and also do sketch book work on it...

But lately for the past 2/3 months I've felt so depressed, maybe it's winter depression who knows! - but the thing is i don't know what i need to satisfy me or cure this "pain"!!! shopping didn't help (and boy did i burn a hole in my credit card), chocolate didn't either (think i gained a few!)...and neither did taking a walk to clear my mind.

oh i dunno maybe I just need love!! unfortunately I'm not good with that section. Threre's something wrong with me I swear - but I just can't see it. I'm 18 and I've NEVER EVER had a boyfriend! can you believe it. Am I too ugly? or maybe I don't deserve one? who knows...but friends always say that my time will come...but I'm so sick and tired of waiting.

Y'know men are so hard to understand sometimes... Grrr!

ok that's my stress and hard feelings that i've been wanting to get out - I'm gonna take a shower now.